Biker BBQ!!

Wooo wee it's hot outside!!! Damn this summer is brutal! I'm at a BBQ at this girl Troubles house. It's off the chain FUN! How about a twenty foot waterside and a yard full of bikers for FUN! There's food but I've been too busy swimming and sunning. Raynella is having fun too she's drinking beer with the boys! My daddy spoke to me yesterday, said he was worried about me catching aids or dieing with a pipe in my hand. Duhhh, he has to know I'm tough and I've been through a lot and can survive my own damn self. This is why I stay gone. I need to get back to Vegas, Ray said she won't let me go she loves me too much, I like that and all but damn I'm getting nowhere here. I love her but I'm not gay just sick of men! She wants me to just stay up in the trailer all day watching soap operas and what not but that ain't me. If I get up to the Truck stop and get my nerve up I'll take off. I always do. I just haven't done it yet. Just gettin high and living one desperate moment to the next.

Raynella and me.

Well I'm alright don't pay the ransom!!!! I've been in Kentucky miserable as hell! Got back smoking crack and street whoring bad. I need to get outta here!! I met a female trucker at the truck stop she's my lover and girlfriend. There I said it! I'm tired of men!!! She takes good care of me and is helping me get off this pipe. Daddy's been mad at me as well as the whole family really. The only person who talks to me is Jessica. Her third nipple grew back and she has been wanting to get it removed again. The baby is good tho, she's a good momma! I'm a real mess! I miss Vegas but haven't got back there. Raynella wants me to stay in Kentucky. She's got a nice trailer and property outside of Paris. I stay there sometimes but I stole her power drill and pawned it which caused stress as you might well figure it would. She got it back but there's a trust issue now. I just get high and lay around. She didn't know nothing about my blog! I get to use her lap top to update as long as she's here with me. Whatever! So I stole power drill she don't even use!! I love y'all, write me I need the support right now!

New year, new life, same shit!

Happy new year everybody! I'm still in Kentucky with daddy but I'm heading back to Las Vegas tonight. Had a nice Christmas with everybody. I run outta money after Christmas! Nothing much to speak of really, getting fat here with all this good food!! I'm wondering what's going on with my body I missed my period. Wouldn't that be some shit if I'm pregnant!! Omg I can't be!!! Thought I could not get pregnant? Trying not to think about it. Jules left me, she was gone when I got back from the grocery store. Ain't seen her since. That was the day after Christmas, I'm guessing she went back to Sam. She can't live down and out too long. Fucking bitch. Whatever I got to focus on me! Leaving on the bus at 7:20. I'll miss my family but I gotta head out. Hope I'm making the right decision to go back to Vegas. I wasn't doing so bad there. I kinda like my screwed up life!

Jail sucks

So here I am, back from jail. Damn street whoring ain't for me anymore! I sat it out hell I don't want to go through all that court bullshit. Jules took care of things while I was gone. She really wants to go home for Christmas. I do too, I could do about a week at home. Honestly I'd go today but I don't want to ride the damn greyhound! Still bummed about being in jail. It is my way of earning a damn living! I would say it is a victim less crime but there is a victim, me. There ain't another job I can work and get by like I am. I'm not suited for anything else now that I'm a whore. I need to go home, need that Kentucky air. Should I go back to the bunny ranch? I won't get arrested but I'm so bored there! Auugghh, what to do. Maybe I need a new boyfriend! A nice guy with a big heart. None left from what I hear. I'm going to Kentucky fuck it I miss my daddy!

Found my red bikini!

Guess what I found today??? My red bikini and my other dance panties that got stole off the line! Can you guess where I found them??? Under the matress in that damn perverts room! I was chatting with the maid when she come by his room, she knew about someone stealing my stuff. Anyhow, she went to flip the mattress and found them all laid out! Fucking weirdo. I knew he took them. I'm going to just washing them and carry on with it! He moved out, I'm a whore so how nasty could they be? Lots of washing will get them clean. It's nice to have my red bikini back, I look so hot in it! I did get to see an old friend yesterday. Remember that big guy I saw that was in town for the poultry convention?? It was a while back, any way he called, he was in town for a bachelor party. He wanted me to dance for the party. Hell yeah, that is straight up easy money!! No sex just dancing! Made a little more then $300 including tips! So I'm gonna smoke me a cigarette and drink this beer Jules just brought in. Y'all write to me!

Go home pretty girl, save your soul.

So here I am. Missing my daddy today. I just got off the phone with him, he's doing good, I always hope he's not drinking as much. I got trashed last night, getting tired of waking up with a hangover. Jules hasn't been very busy with the cab. So many cab drivers here in Vegas. I was having a hard time not smoking crack with miss Susan's sister. I know it's right there. All I got to do is walk over there. Jules said if I get on that shit again she's leaving. I can't loose my best friend over that. Anyhow, I started talking to this girl on the street has night. She's a runaway from Texas, so pretty not your average street whore. I tried to tell her to go home. She wasn't trying to here no advice. Hell I been on the street for ten years if not more. She hasn't sold her soul for this kinda living yet. She was busy too. The men who pay us also destroy us. She don't see that yet.

I got fired :(

I had this guy call me for a date. He's a horse breeder. Good sex, great tipper! He talked a lot about horses. I guess he makes a lot of money. Today is not the best day for me. Miss Susan's sister is smoking crack and I can smell it. Makes me jones so bad for it. I just want to go over and smoke with her. Damn Jules ain't here she'd help me by taking me out for a while. I got money in my pocket too, oh god what do I do. If I go over there I'll burn up every dollar I have. Damn! oh, I did get fired from the club. The boss caught me and this other chick snorting coke! Every girl there does coke but it's just me who gets fired. Fuck that job I can live off my dates. I'm in a bad mood, sorry about that.

Log splitter!!!!!!!

Oh last night was crazy fun I think? I remember very little! Me and Jules partied like 9th graders with a case of beer!! Went to this dirty little hole in the wall bar that pours 3 for 1 drinks! Well, I started drinking cranberry and vodka then here comes the shots! Jules was drinking rum and coke she likes them. We got trashed! Jules had to carry me to the car! Now my head hurts. This guy that lives at the trailer park behind the motel has been running a damn log splitter all damn day long. It's splitting my head wide open! In a little while were going to go to this dinner buffet at the Excaliber hotel. It's good and only place with good seafood at least I thinks it's the best. No calls yet, I need a date. I did so well with Mr. Freddy I paid the rent and still had money left to party on. I like him. Jules gets to drive this black Lincoln for certain big wigs now, she loves it! Almost like a limo! She's trying to be a limo driver but she got to work her way up for that. I'm gonna change my craigslist now and try to make some cash. Wish me luck!

Love to love you baby!

Oh lord happy Monday! I had a pretty good weekend. Got to see Mr. Freddy, he's back in town for business. All of us at the hotel had a barbecue out by the pool. Plenty of beer, Jules did the grilling and I just watched and drank a bunch of beer! The pervert in 118 didn't come he was too busy wearing my damn thongs! Ms Susan came and sat with us, she don't drink beer but she did bring some potato salad. I was having so much fun then Mr.Freddy called wanted to know if I'd be free at 10 o'clock!! Hell ya! Any time Mr. Freddy calls I'm ready! Dinner and a date love that! He usually drops about $400 on me! I wore a halter dress and my red heels, I looked sexy! We had steak for dinner then went up to his room, ordered a movie and hung out for a bit. He's a good lover too! Wish I could find a good man like him to be my boyfriend. I always pick the losers. I'm going shopping later get me some new drawers and maybe some short shorts :)

Numb.

My life is a mess. I went to the "pink pony" to dance last night. Made a pocket full of money! Paid my rent for two weeks, bought a real sexy thong for work. It's black with rhinestones! So pretty, I'm heading to the mall to get me some boots to match my thong! Me and Jules smoked a blunt now I'm numb. I'm jumping in the pool as soon as I get back! It sure would be nice to get a date now, with some business man who wants to treat me to dinner! I'm so damn hungry! If I don't get a call from my Craigslist ad I'm going back to the pony. I'm sick to death dancing on a bar for money. I'm good at it but I feel like I'm getting to old. So I'm gonna focus on my Craigslist ad. It's much easier and quicker! I shaved my tootie a bit ago, it's growing back and I'm scratching like crack head! I miss my family, my aunt Gaynelle and Jessica, not Terry she's a nasty meth head. They would be disappointed in my choice of careers. Easy money! Once you give yourself away for money you lose all self worth. It gets easier. That makes me numb too.

If all else fails.

I almost didn't want to talk about my life today. But here I go. Had a date last night, some nasty guy with greasy hair. His old Cadillac smelled like cigars and sweat. He said he's from Vegas, but nobody is from Vegas! I made $80 big deal :( I'm just going through a rough time. Today I did go buy a new bikini, purple with white stripes. Not as cute as the red one. I got a date later with some young guy. They're usually ok but sometimes they last too long! I'm gonna finish this 12 pack before my date. The nice lady next door from me has had it rough too, so I invited her to come drink with me. She had a couple but I could see her getting tired. We spoke about my daddy and it made me call him. He wants me to come home again. I just acted like I didn't hear him. Anyhow, my tan looks good so I know what I'll wear tonight. A strapless hot pink dress and my red high heels. Sexy!! At least I'll look good tonight if all else fails!

Damn perverts :(

You are not gonna believe what happened!!! I strung a clothes line outside right behind my room. It's private, you can't see it from the street. I hand washed my things I wear to dance in and some nasty fucker stole everything on the damn line!!!!! What the hell now what am I suppose to do for work clothes! I got $23 dollars to my name. I got to come up with a date soon! I'll update my craigslist ad and see if I can get a date. This is when you get messed up. Start taking chances without considering all the things you should be paying attention to. Is he a business man? Is he clean? Will he not strangle me?? I need money and I can't dance now, even my red bikini is gone! I guess I could find an all nude dancing job! I just want to go swimming but I got to think of something to do to make money. I bet it's that creepy old man staying in room 114. He's weird and is probably wearing them around his room! Damn perverts!

Picking up strays.

So let me tell you what happened last night! This girl at the club was trying to dance and make her money. Her dumb ass boyfriend came up to the club with a bag of Mc Donalds for her. She needed it don't look like she's eaten in a damn week. Anyhow, he put a rig, or a shot full of heroin, in the bag so she could dance high I guess. The manager of the club opened the bag and saw it, called the police and had her arrested!! I feel sorry for her. She's an addict, a nasty stripper and now she has no job. I know all choices she made. But, she's past having a good time on heroin now she has to have it. I just hope she finds the strength to pull herself up before she dies. My life ain't so bad when I see how she's living. If I had a big farm somewhere I'd take in all the strays. So they could live free. I'd pick up the stray dogs and cats too!

Red bikini don't let me down! :)

Daddy called today. He doesn't sound real good. I may need to take the bus home for a week. Cook for him, clean up the house, do laundry. That's what I'd be doing if I was to live in Kentucky again. I'm not the marrying kind! I don't want another man. Then you look at how I make a living and wonder about things. Men or not? Income or attitude? I'm sure thinking a lot today. I was speaking to this tranny who lives here at the motel I'm staying at. Miss Sugar is her name. Jules says "she" is a "he" and should not be called a "she". Sometimes Jules pisses me off. This man dresses and lives as a woman. Makes a ton of money as a tranny escourt, spends more on meth then to live any better. I guess were all in this ugly old boat trying to live better. Anyway that red bikini is making me some money! With them red shoes, I am hot!! Another day another dollar, gotta pay rent today. Working my ass off tonight! xoxo!

When alls left to be said, go swimming!

Look out Vegas I'm back at it! Choked or not I'm done letting that shit get me down!! I was dancing last night with my red bikini and my red shoes! So cute in that outfit if I do say so my damn self! Made ok money enough to keep me at the motel another week. If I didn't blow my money as soon as I get it I'd have something. Between cigarettes, beer, shopping and gambling all I do is barely get by. This girl at the club saves every dollar she makes outside of cigarettes and food. She's trying to get home to Kansas. She's a bit strange, lives in a motel with 3 other chicks. She ain't so pretty but she sure makes that money. My craigslist ad hasn't had a call in damn near a week! I'm gonna have to update that. But first I'm going swimming! Thanks for reading friends!

Could have been choked to death.

Hey y'all. I've had a rough couple of days. I got picked up off the street and got the shit beat outta me. This guy seemed so normal, he was polite and just low key. The next thing I know he punches me in the eye hard! Then he tried to choke me! I grabbed his junk and squeezed as hard as I could! It worked he took his hands off me and I had the chance to bolt! I ran to this tattoo parlor and they called the police. I got a shiner as big as an orange! The police came and took a report. Big deal. This man was out to kill me and the best they could do was a frigging report. It's because I'm a whore, if I was any normal girl they'd have dogs out searching and cops at every intersection. I think I'm going home for a week to just chill. I called daddy and told him what happened and he just wants me home. I haven't seen Jules she's probably out there chasing that pipe. She has a hard time staying away from meth. I'm done for now but y'all saw hi to me! I need your good words!

Waxed my tootie to look good dancing in my red bikini!

Busy, busy, me! I danced all weekend. Made about $800, not enough to keep me going back. I'm so out of shape I was panting and sweating to death! I bought a new red bikini, and some body glitter/lotion stuff. I like how sparkly it is on my tan skin. I talked to daddy, he still thinks I'm working in a hotel kitchen. He might know better I don't know. I don't tell him about the money I'm making. He'd know I was doing something he doesn't like. I haven't had a call for a date in about, 2 or 3 days. My last date was with Adam, the wheelchair guy. He was so cool. Stripping is just not me anymore. It just wears me out! I had to get my tootie waxed, oh my good that shit hurt! This chick at the strip club did it for me. Holy shit I was so sore but it did look good. I am so damn hungry I had a taco earlier but I'm still starving. If I don't get a date tonight I'll go dance tomorrow. I need me some damn money! I spent all my money drinking over the weekend.

Wheelchair Adam and lake Meade!

Yawnnnnn…I am exhausted! Last night was one of the funniest nights I've ever had! I got a call from this guy who say my ad, he saw last weeks picture of my butt and wanted me to spend some "time" with him. So beings that I'm broke I said sure what the hell?? I get to his hotel on the top floor of the Wynn and when I get there I see he is in a wheelchair. No feeling from his neck down. I forget what the fancy word for that is! So I try to be nice and act like I'm not noticing the wheel chair. We talked for a minute and he said he called me for "company" no touching, no sexy nothing. Hell I already like this set up! He was talking about everything and so was I, he's from South Carolina, then the wreck that caused him to be in a wheel chair blah, blah, blah. He's a nice guy I could talk to him all night. So after a bit he said "let's go for a ride!!! Off we go, were going to lake Meade! In a friggin' limo!! What??? For real! I never been in a real limo! That as so FUN, I had a few drinks and stood up and put my head through the sun roof which was FUN as hell! we got to lake Meade and I got to feed the carp and just chill on his house boat! Now that is so awesome I can't wait to tell daddy!! All night till about 5 am, I was getting tired and so was he I could tell. He told me I was beautiful and if he could he'd kiss me and we'd do it lmao! His name is Adam, he dropped $500 dollars on me! He said he'd call me again, I sure hope so I like him :)

I'll be your baby tonight ;))

Here I am! Tonight I'm going to dance at this dirty little strip club so you know I'm gonna make some money. I'm out of shape I'll probably sweat to death and break my damn ankle!! Jules and me went to this outdoor mall and I got some new sexy shoes 5' red strappy heels!! I can't wait to wear them! I got to be there by 6 I get the early shift. If somebody don't shows up, I get a late shift too. I got a new ad running too, although the last ad made me some good money, like there's such a thing as bad money??? I'll probably catch me a nap by the pool before getting my self together. I'm starving!! Jules is making her favorite spaghetti with meatballs!!! I can't eat too much, that pasta will sure weigh me down! Daddy wrote me a letter, he was talking about the holidays and he wanting me to come home. I do want to see everybody. Maybe I will make it for thanksgiving??