Everything sucks :(

Jules left me again, couldn't take anymore of this bullshit. I'm working on a date for tonight. I'm broke now I gotta pay the rent on my own. This is the kind of shit that drives me to do drugs. I just want to destroy myself to feel better. That makes no sense what so ever. I'm gonna probably get high again tonight. Being sad and lonely is all I can feel now. Why am I so hard to love? It don't matter I guess. I called aunt Gaynelle she talked about the baby and told me Jessica lost 15 lbs!! They want me to come home. What will I do there? Get fatter! Somebody out there talk to me, I'm miserable and we all know misery loves company.